Salam Love InshAllah,
I will be getting married next month and I will move from the stage of not being allowed to be alone with my future husband to being allowed to be intimate with him and I must say I am feeling nervous. My question is about my wedding night or any night that we choose to be intimate. I grew up in a conservative community and attended a Muslim school so my knowledge about sex and intimacy is limited to that which may pop up in a conversation of inexperienced, virgin girls.
The truth is I am nervous that due to my lack of experience or knowledge I will be either repulsed by any act of intimacy (kissing and sex) or be so put off it that it will be something I dread. How do I prepare myself for taking the step towards being confident? I have low self esteem with regards to my body so the thought of being naked in front of my future husband is not a pleasant thought. Being a bad kisser or generally bad in bed is what scares me the most. I don’t want my nerves and setbacks to affect him or send the wrong signals. I don’t want him to feel like he is trying hard to please me in bed but I am not reciprocating simply because I don’t know or am too embarrassed.
All this is playing havoc with my nerves. I’d like to know how I can prepare myself and perhaps find out what men like so I can please him and perhaps put to bed my worries of my lack of experience effecting performance etc. Any advice and information would be greatly appreciated.
Nervous about Sex
Miss Sunshine replies:
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Our contributor Asiila Imani shared this beautiful video of an interracial, interfaith, and multicultural wedding with us.
It’s the most joyful, moving and wonderful wedding video we’ve seen in a long time.
Congrats, Otis and Nitasha, wherever you are!
Love InshAllah co-editor Nura weds her beloved this weekend, inshAllah. Please join us in wishing them both a lifetime (& beyond) of great love, joy, & contentment!
Together, maybe we can convince her to share their beautiful love story, here