On My Own

Image by Erik Madigan Heck

A beautiful, painful and honest piece by Hafsa Arain at the website This Recording:

‎I have to face the truth: I might never be with someone. I might never have a boyfriend, and I might never get married. I have never met a man who wanted to be with me. I am alone. I have to learn to be okay with being alone – no, with being single. Loneliness is okay once in a while, but being single is never okay. Because being single is not a value you have, but the net worth you own. And my net worth is only myself.

Read the rest, here.


2 Comments on “On My Own”

  1. Chinyere says:

    This touched me for several reasons…like, I feel like I’ve said very similar things to much of this piece before. Like, I may have even said something very similar last week. I think many of us women find ourselves here, even if it’s not true that no one has ever wanted to be with us. We can’t say that! As many unrequited loves as we have had, there’s probably at least one other out there.

    It’s easy for us to dip into despair, but reading this from another and being outside of myself, I can emphatically say, no way! Your life is not over, so you can’t make such a grave statement! You haven’t even lived tomorrow yet! How can you say?

    I think many women of many faiths and backgrounds find ourselves exactly here. For the sake of mindfulness, this gives me hope because it lets me know I’m not alone in feeling this way. It also gives me hope that I’m able to have such hope for the writer…it helps me transfer that hope to myself.

    It’s that push and pull, the rejection of dating someone you really didn’t want to be with and the declaration that no one has ever wanted you. The real thing is that no one you’re attracted to has wanted you back…yet. Yet yet yet! As my friends are always telling me, you only need one…having more than one is a problem. You only need one. Today does not equal the rest of your life, and today is not a day to be saved for just the right moment in the future to lament that you didn’t live up your single life as much as you could.

    Great piece, capturing a moment that is not solid, that is very much in flux, that is not defined, that is very much ambivalent, that is not complete, that is very much in progress. Many of us are here more times than we like to admit. She gave the feeling voice.